How I got here: I got pregnant on Father's Day of 2016, and had a really awful, very high risk pregnancy that lasted until February 22nd, at which time they induced me early because it took them all that time to finally listen to just how quickly I was dying. At that point, I had gained 55lbs, my belly had swelled enormous 10" above my already pudgy size, I'd been coughing and throwing up liquid out of my lungs for months, and had been suffering from swelling everywhere below the belly so severely I was confined to a wheelchair. No matter how many times I complained about these things, the doctor who was taking massive amounts of insurance money from the state of Oregon to see me every single week insisted I was fine, swelling was normal even in that severity, and that I should just wait it out, because I was just fat and pregnant. Finally on February 20th he had a lightbulb moment and suddenly realized I was about to die of pre-eclampsia, and rushed to induce me to undo his mistakes before my loved ones had to sue him for wrongful death. The doctor spent the entire pregnancy telling me that I had gestational diabetes and ignored the fact that my test results in combination with my medical history clearly meant I didn't, I just had insulin resistance, and pumped me full of medication to help make sure the baby was small. She was small alright- 4lbs 14oz. Everyone commented that she looked like a doll. Tiny, but perfect, and constantly angry. The first hospital gave me a literal brown paper sack-full of medications and did few tests, then sent me home. I almost drowned in the liquid in my lungs within two nights of being home, and begrudgingly listened to my nurse mother-in-laws demands to take me to a bigger, better educational hospital downtown, because at this point my swelling still hadn't gone down, despite having been in the first hospital for a week after birth.
The second hospital was amazing, and I'll always credit them for not only saving my life, but for renewing my faith in medical professionals. They kept me in the cardiology wing for over another week, because as it turns out, all of the problems with this pregnancy were because my heart was failing. When your heart fails, your whole body, your organs, your lungs fill with excess salty fluid that your heart isn't strong enough to process out of your blood. It seeps into everything, and had resulted in my massive swelling, massive weight gain, and vomiting of liquids from my lungs. The nurses at the educational hospital even went so far above and beyond that dozens of them took turns watching after my tiny 5lb newborn baby girl to give us a break, because otherwise it was all on my partner who never left my side through any of it. When they finally gave me the medication necessary to drain my body of excess edema, I lost 80lbs in one week.
Fresh out of the hospital, I was on 22 pills a day. These days I've gotten it down to 12, and we have hopes of less soon. It will likely be at least 8 for the rest of my life. My daughter only survived 7 weeks even though no one could find anything wrong with her. We found her lifeless body on Easter Sunday- the autopsy was incredibly thorough and came up with nothing but a high white cell count. She spent nearly every minute of every day screaming the angriest baby screams ever, and then one day we woke up to a terrifying silence. We will never be the same. My body will never be the same. The doctors have forbidden me from ever having children again, but every birth control they tried on me gave me multi-month constant severe periods, because something else is clearly wrong with my reproductive system, but they're not sure what.
After our daughter died, I let my partner quit his job and stay home to take care of me. I had recently removed all our roommates to minimize drama and financial flakiness, and solely shouldered the huge burden of $1800/month rent for somewhere I still had to walk a massive dog on a leash at. The only reason I was able to manage such a feat was the help of three loyal slaves, one of which being a doctor who understood my situation more than most. Depression crushed us all anyway. Trying to plaster on a fake smile to go stare mindlessly at a webcam in a chatroom full of strangers that won't even type the words 'hi' became my daily unachievable goal, but I fought to maintain the brand name I'd spent 16 years developing. To this day, 25% of the people that enter that room want to talk about pregnancy fetish, the details of my pregnancy, then leave as soon as I give them even a brief smidgen of the honest answers. They never even make it past 'heart failure' to find out she died. Despite all that, I managed to not only pay rent by myself until the end of our lease (which inconveniently fell on my 34th birthday), but to save up $3500 to get us the hell out of that awful place full of the ghosts of a life we almost had but that slipped through our fingers.
A few weeks after my daughter died, my partner then had the lack of fortune to discover a second dead body in our house- that of my 9 year old lab mix dog, who'd been the only thing to get me through many tumultuous years. I thought it would be the nail in my coffin, but somehow no one ever told the world to stop turning. The DoctorSlave worked out an installment plan deal to get us enough money to move, then began slowly but surely flaking on major payments- rent, the first installment, then eventually the second and last installment. He paid one installment of $3000, giving us $3500 to move, but since he never sent the second, I didn't have enough time to convince any landlord to rent to a person with a mastiff. The money from the first installment plus what we'd managed to save up ended up being exactly what we needed to overfill the biggest tow-behind trailer Uhaul rents absolutely to the brim, and we simply had to give away 75% of our belongings, including almost every single piece of furniture, small kitchen appliance, and most of my clothes. Our plan was to get a storage locker for our belongings, give away the remaining dog, and rent a tiny extended stay motel room in Atlanta where at least I'd have friends, potential roommates, and had the doctor ever come up with the last payment, an ability to rent a house.
The House: At the last minute just before we left, the best friend of a close family member (that I no longer even speak to due to sex worker hate) offered up an alternative to ending up sleeping in our car if something went wrong- He had a piece of land with a practically abandoned, easily condemable 1880's farmhouse that had been split down the center to move it there. No one had lived there in a decade, and it needed a lot of work, but the idea of fixing it up to distract us from the crushing depression that rolled over us sounded like a relief, especially coupled with the idea of being able to keep my dog. The house has no heat, no insulation, no kitchen, no bathroom, and what little plumbing there is is just PVC that drains into the yard. The toilet situation involves a bucket that is emptied every three days into a septic tank in the yard. It took us eight weeks to fix up the tub area enough to even take a basic shower. Every room has at least some black mold, but the bathroom is the worst of it. Atop the ten foot ceilings and walls of ancient ship lathe are massive amounts of black mold. There's gaping giant holes in multiple places, in both the ceiling and floor, along the hallway where the house was once split. We are unable to use the left half of the house, because the owner uses it for storage, which is full of poisonous snakes and rats. Thankfully only the rats so far have been brave enough to come to our side of the house, but every room contains an unbelievable amount of cobwebs and giant Texas spiders. There's a one inch gap under the front door, and no closet or cabinet of any kind anywhere. The 'kitchen' is just an ADA-level sink with PVC pipes that cannot handle even the smallest scrap of food from a scraped plate. There were no appliances of any kind here, and anything past the fridge and freezer we got are out of the question because of the amount of power they'd need to pull. We've resorted to slowly collecting outdoor grills and indoor small appliances like an inefficient hot plate and a countertop oven/rotisserie combo to manage to cook, but there are still no real counters or storage, and the black mold remains there too.
It ended up being a good thing that we aimed for Texas instead of Georgia, because as it turns out, every penny we had was only exactly enough to get us here, and we wouldn't have made it to Georgia. I've been here since the beginning of October, and now as it approaches Christmas, I have no tree, no presents, and very little hope from day to day. I've gotten better at putting on the fake smile necessary to help fans bring their guard down enough to spend money on my porn, but shooting anything here is extremely difficult given the condition of the place, not to mention the condition of us within it.
The Amount Needed: $3600 would at least begin to put me in a position to be able to move out if I can find anyone to rent to me. I'm not even picky where to move at this point, but I'd be fine with most deep east parts of Texas, any part of Florida, or most parts of Georgia. $1250 first months rent, $1250 deposit, $500 pet deposit, $600 Budget Truck Rental are the minimum expenses, but so far no one outside Texas (and even then very, very few people) is willing to rent to someone with a Great Dane/Mastiff dog. He's 200lbs, poorly house broken but very crate trained, but painfully shy and has severe separation anxiety so is very rude to other people. I sold him for a small rehoming fee just to cover the cost of his kennel when I was about to leave Oregon, but he was so badly behaved that the woman I gave him to put a stop payment on her check the next day and dropped him off with no warning back at my apartment the next day. This is a woman that spent hours texting and leaving me drunk voicemails rambling about how beautiful he was, and how she'd love him forever and that would be his forever home. This completely dashed my last hopes of being able to find a rental, because most rental companies have insurance that bans certain breeds, and almost all of those insurance companies ban either Great Danes, English Mastiffs, or both. Individual rental owners also tend to have a very strict 'no dogs over 25 or 50lbs' rule, and I'm not exaggerating when I say he's 200. I got lucky when I rented the apartment I did in Portland, at the time it was a good deal for the amount of space, I had roommates to help, and the complex had no pet weight limit.
Summary: I know very few will probably have read to this point, but I applaud you if you did. If I were anyone else, I wouldn't believe any of this either, but it's all completely 100% true, and I have numerous documents to verify every bit. I hope you'll be moved by this enough to help get us the hell out of here and somewhere were we can move forward with our lives. You're welcome to donate on My ManyVids FundMe Page Here (must click 'FundMe' on left of page), or you're welcome to reach out if you'd rather use CirclePay, NiteFlirt, Streamate Gold, PP or similar. Even if you can't justify sending money for the sake of charity, don't hesitate to spoil yourself by buying a little of my porn, especially on ManyVids. It all goes towards making sure we can survive another day here. I've still yet to even be able to afford to do laundry, and what little charity I was offered by other camgirls for the sake of Thanksgiving only resulted in 2 of the 3 that offered actually giving me anything at all. Even if you can't afford to spare anything, I also need someone that can rent us a single family home, and possibly an animal charity that can take care of my daneiff, plus heck, I probably could use a medical malpractice lawyer as well. Thank you in advance for your assistance, and happy holidays.
#MVHelpingHand #Christmas #Charity #Homeless #DogRescue #Daneiff #GreatDane #Mastiff #SIDS #NoMoreDeadBabyJokes
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The second hospital was amazing, and I'll always credit them for not only saving my life, but for renewing my faith in medical professionals. They kept me in the cardiology wing for over another week, because as it turns out, all of the problems with this pregnancy were because my heart was failing. When your heart fails, your whole body, your organs, your lungs fill with excess salty fluid that your heart isn't strong enough to process out of your blood. It seeps into everything, and had resulted in my massive swelling, massive weight gain, and vomiting of liquids from my lungs. The nurses at the educational hospital even went so far above and beyond that dozens of them took turns watching after my tiny 5lb newborn baby girl to give us a break, because otherwise it was all on my partner who never left my side through any of it. When they finally gave me the medication necessary to drain my body of excess edema, I lost 80lbs in one week.
Fresh out of the hospital, I was on 22 pills a day. These days I've gotten it down to 12, and we have hopes of less soon. It will likely be at least 8 for the rest of my life. My daughter only survived 7 weeks even though no one could find anything wrong with her. We found her lifeless body on Easter Sunday- the autopsy was incredibly thorough and came up with nothing but a high white cell count. She spent nearly every minute of every day screaming the angriest baby screams ever, and then one day we woke up to a terrifying silence. We will never be the same. My body will never be the same. The doctors have forbidden me from ever having children again, but every birth control they tried on me gave me multi-month constant severe periods, because something else is clearly wrong with my reproductive system, but they're not sure what.
After our daughter died, I let my partner quit his job and stay home to take care of me. I had recently removed all our roommates to minimize drama and financial flakiness, and solely shouldered the huge burden of $1800/month rent for somewhere I still had to walk a massive dog on a leash at. The only reason I was able to manage such a feat was the help of three loyal slaves, one of which being a doctor who understood my situation more than most. Depression crushed us all anyway. Trying to plaster on a fake smile to go stare mindlessly at a webcam in a chatroom full of strangers that won't even type the words 'hi' became my daily unachievable goal, but I fought to maintain the brand name I'd spent 16 years developing. To this day, 25% of the people that enter that room want to talk about pregnancy fetish, the details of my pregnancy, then leave as soon as I give them even a brief smidgen of the honest answers. They never even make it past 'heart failure' to find out she died. Despite all that, I managed to not only pay rent by myself until the end of our lease (which inconveniently fell on my 34th birthday), but to save up $3500 to get us the hell out of that awful place full of the ghosts of a life we almost had but that slipped through our fingers.
A few weeks after my daughter died, my partner then had the lack of fortune to discover a second dead body in our house- that of my 9 year old lab mix dog, who'd been the only thing to get me through many tumultuous years. I thought it would be the nail in my coffin, but somehow no one ever told the world to stop turning. The DoctorSlave worked out an installment plan deal to get us enough money to move, then began slowly but surely flaking on major payments- rent, the first installment, then eventually the second and last installment. He paid one installment of $3000, giving us $3500 to move, but since he never sent the second, I didn't have enough time to convince any landlord to rent to a person with a mastiff. The money from the first installment plus what we'd managed to save up ended up being exactly what we needed to overfill the biggest tow-behind trailer Uhaul rents absolutely to the brim, and we simply had to give away 75% of our belongings, including almost every single piece of furniture, small kitchen appliance, and most of my clothes. Our plan was to get a storage locker for our belongings, give away the remaining dog, and rent a tiny extended stay motel room in Atlanta where at least I'd have friends, potential roommates, and had the doctor ever come up with the last payment, an ability to rent a house.
The House: At the last minute just before we left, the best friend of a close family member (that I no longer even speak to due to sex worker hate) offered up an alternative to ending up sleeping in our car if something went wrong- He had a piece of land with a practically abandoned, easily condemable 1880's farmhouse that had been split down the center to move it there. No one had lived there in a decade, and it needed a lot of work, but the idea of fixing it up to distract us from the crushing depression that rolled over us sounded like a relief, especially coupled with the idea of being able to keep my dog. The house has no heat, no insulation, no kitchen, no bathroom, and what little plumbing there is is just PVC that drains into the yard. The toilet situation involves a bucket that is emptied every three days into a septic tank in the yard. It took us eight weeks to fix up the tub area enough to even take a basic shower. Every room has at least some black mold, but the bathroom is the worst of it. Atop the ten foot ceilings and walls of ancient ship lathe are massive amounts of black mold. There's gaping giant holes in multiple places, in both the ceiling and floor, along the hallway where the house was once split. We are unable to use the left half of the house, because the owner uses it for storage, which is full of poisonous snakes and rats. Thankfully only the rats so far have been brave enough to come to our side of the house, but every room contains an unbelievable amount of cobwebs and giant Texas spiders. There's a one inch gap under the front door, and no closet or cabinet of any kind anywhere. The 'kitchen' is just an ADA-level sink with PVC pipes that cannot handle even the smallest scrap of food from a scraped plate. There were no appliances of any kind here, and anything past the fridge and freezer we got are out of the question because of the amount of power they'd need to pull. We've resorted to slowly collecting outdoor grills and indoor small appliances like an inefficient hot plate and a countertop oven/rotisserie combo to manage to cook, but there are still no real counters or storage, and the black mold remains there too.
It ended up being a good thing that we aimed for Texas instead of Georgia, because as it turns out, every penny we had was only exactly enough to get us here, and we wouldn't have made it to Georgia. I've been here since the beginning of October, and now as it approaches Christmas, I have no tree, no presents, and very little hope from day to day. I've gotten better at putting on the fake smile necessary to help fans bring their guard down enough to spend money on my porn, but shooting anything here is extremely difficult given the condition of the place, not to mention the condition of us within it.
The Amount Needed: $3600 would at least begin to put me in a position to be able to move out if I can find anyone to rent to me. I'm not even picky where to move at this point, but I'd be fine with most deep east parts of Texas, any part of Florida, or most parts of Georgia. $1250 first months rent, $1250 deposit, $500 pet deposit, $600 Budget Truck Rental are the minimum expenses, but so far no one outside Texas (and even then very, very few people) is willing to rent to someone with a Great Dane/Mastiff dog. He's 200lbs, poorly house broken but very crate trained, but painfully shy and has severe separation anxiety so is very rude to other people. I sold him for a small rehoming fee just to cover the cost of his kennel when I was about to leave Oregon, but he was so badly behaved that the woman I gave him to put a stop payment on her check the next day and dropped him off with no warning back at my apartment the next day. This is a woman that spent hours texting and leaving me drunk voicemails rambling about how beautiful he was, and how she'd love him forever and that would be his forever home. This completely dashed my last hopes of being able to find a rental, because most rental companies have insurance that bans certain breeds, and almost all of those insurance companies ban either Great Danes, English Mastiffs, or both. Individual rental owners also tend to have a very strict 'no dogs over 25 or 50lbs' rule, and I'm not exaggerating when I say he's 200. I got lucky when I rented the apartment I did in Portland, at the time it was a good deal for the amount of space, I had roommates to help, and the complex had no pet weight limit.
Summary: I know very few will probably have read to this point, but I applaud you if you did. If I were anyone else, I wouldn't believe any of this either, but it's all completely 100% true, and I have numerous documents to verify every bit. I hope you'll be moved by this enough to help get us the hell out of here and somewhere were we can move forward with our lives. You're welcome to donate on My ManyVids FundMe Page Here (must click 'FundMe' on left of page), or you're welcome to reach out if you'd rather use CirclePay, NiteFlirt, Streamate Gold, PP or similar. Even if you can't justify sending money for the sake of charity, don't hesitate to spoil yourself by buying a little of my porn, especially on ManyVids. It all goes towards making sure we can survive another day here. I've still yet to even be able to afford to do laundry, and what little charity I was offered by other camgirls for the sake of Thanksgiving only resulted in 2 of the 3 that offered actually giving me anything at all. Even if you can't afford to spare anything, I also need someone that can rent us a single family home, and possibly an animal charity that can take care of my daneiff, plus heck, I probably could use a medical malpractice lawyer as well. Thank you in advance for your assistance, and happy holidays.
#MVHelpingHand #Christmas #Charity #Homeless #DogRescue #Daneiff #GreatDane #Mastiff #SIDS #NoMoreDeadBabyJokes